36 thoughts on “Discount Dan's Condolence and/or Revenge Baskets

  1. I like to think that when there is a mix up with the baskets, just sending another basket solves the problem. A basket for everything.

  2. I dont buy Nike or Apple products because they are made by underage Capellan slaves, but Discount Dan has finally convinced me that if I dont buy his baskets, I would be robbing many small Capellans of the opportunity to be worked to death, thereby having to be Capellan for longer, which is far worse than death.

  3. Discount Dan is the only person I trust to take all of my money no questions asked. That mugger downtown rejected my Canadian dollars, the Church rejected my donation of "blood money" and that pan handler threw away my Russian rubles, but I have no fears that Discount Dan will turn away my money.

  4. Dear Mr. Dan. I received the Urbanmech I ordered today, with a complimentary gift basket. When I opened the package, there was a lance of Hunchbacks inside, and the "Gift basket" contained thermite grenades. I am now in possession of 4 part melted mechs and 3rd degree burns. 5/7 for prompt delivery.

  5. So, what kind of apology basket would Mister Dan be sending if I… I dunno, for the sake of argument, kinda sorta, maybe… blew up an HPG Uplink and now have a price on my head from Comstar? Asking for a friend…

  6. I ordered a basket, and 3 minutes later Four men came and collected my family and assets, and now my condolence basket is on its way to my mother!

    Five stars, and thanks for the tent!!

  7. "Sorry we murdered your entire family trying to get your Marauder, because the bolted on rockets made us think it was a Timber Wolf: here is a basket with 500 fortune cookies with Blake's non-canon words of wisdom attached."

    -Comstar

  8. I hear everyone who donated $69 or more to charity gets a basket. Which basket? That's part of the fun! People like surprises.

  9. Discount Dan sent me my own revenge basket of grenade-bees, fucking nearly cost me my living room! My neighbor is livid! So what does Discount Dan do?? He said it was an accident and sent me a 'Sorry'-basket, which was a methed up possum with metal dentures – WTF!! IM IN THE ICU, I MIGHT LOSE AN EYE, MY CAT HAS BEEN EATEN AND MY ARM IS MISSING!!

  10. Discount Dan sold me a Revenge Basket that accidentally killed my Grandma and her cat. At first I was upset and ready too sue but as it turned out I'm the sole inheritor of her vast fortune of Beanie Babies and ancient door stops. Thanks Discount Dan!

  11. To Stephen Amaris
    From the Ghost Black Watch
    Sorry we destroyed all your mechs.
    (Attached to Nuke basket)…
    The civil war would have been avoided, think of the savings!!!

  12. The only thing that would make this better is if discount dan bought off some schlub that bought it of stephen ameris because a court order apology.

  13. Why would you steal MAH business idea, Dan!

    Imma gonna send you a "basket" full of ice cream delivered by a guy named Forrest!

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